An Expert Q&A on the Emotions of Downsizing: Reframing Your Perspective with Rightsizing
Downsizing is more than just moving to a smaller space; it’s an emotional journey filled with nostalgia, memories, and tough decisions. Each item in your home tells a story, holds a memory, and represents a part of your life.
At WellRive, we understand these complexities and are dedicated to making your transition as smooth as possible. Our comprehensive move management solutions are designed to take the stress out of your move, allowing you to focus on what truly matters.
Understanding the Emotional Impact
The possessions in your home are pieces of your history. The thought of downsizing can bring about feelings of anxiety and stress — not only due to the physical aspects of the move but also the emotional strain. Recognizing these emotional challenges is the first step toward navigating them effectively.
Moreover, the act of sorting through personal belongings can trigger powerful emotions. Each item you handle has the potential to bring back vivid memories, making the process both emotionally taxing and cathartic. It’s not uncommon to feel overwhelmed by the sheer volume of decisions that need to be made. Understanding that these reactions are normal and giving yourself permission to feel them can make the downsizing journey more manageable.
Strategies to Manage the Emotional Journey
Instead of focusing on what you are losing, think about what you are gaining: a more manageable space, less clutter, and a new chapter in your life. Reframing the downsizing experience positively can help you see it as an opportunity rather than a loss. By shifting your perspective, you can begin to appreciate the benefits of a smaller, more organized living space. This change can reduce stress and create a sense of liberation from clutter and the upkeep of a larger home. Envisioning a simpler lifestyle can be incredibly empowering and can help you embrace the process of decluttering and downsizing with a positive outlook.
Involving your family in the downsizing process can also lighten the emotional burden. Sharing stories, making decisions together, and reminiscing about cherished memories can make the task more meaningful and less daunting. Family members can offer emotional support and help you sort through belongings with a balanced perspective. This collaborative approach can turn a potentially overwhelming undertaking into an opportunity for bonding and sharing. Additionally, involving family members ensures that treasured items find new homes within the family, preserving their sentimental value.
How to Downsize Your Home
Start by categorizing your belongings into what you want to keep, donate, or sell. This can help you see your possessions more clearly and make the decision process easier. Begin with less emotionally charged areas, such as the bathroom, garage or basement, where items may not hold as much sentimental value. This practice can help build momentum and confidence as you move to more personal spaces.
Visualize your new space and think about how you want it to look and feel. This can make the transition exciting and something to look forward to. Create a floor plan of your new home to understand the available space and decide what furniture and belongings will fit best. Focusing on the functionality and aesthetics of your new environment can help you make more informed choices about what to keep. Consider keeping items that serve multiple purposes or have significant sentimental value, while being realistic about the limited space.
Additionally, it’s helpful to set small, manageable goals to avoid feeling overwhelmed. Break the downsizing process into smaller tasks, tackling one room or category of items at a time. Setting deadlines for each task can keep you on track and make the process less daunting. It’s also beneficial to seek help from friends, family, or professional organizers who can provide both practical assistance and emotional support.
Embracing a New Chapter
While downsizing can be an emotional journey, it can also be a positive step toward a simpler, more manageable life. By reframing your perspective, involving loved ones, and utilizing the support of WellRive’s Move Managers, you can embrace this change with confidence. Downsizing is not just about reducing space; it’s about making room for new experiences and opportunities. With the right mindset and support, you can turn this transition into an exciting new chapter in your life.
To provide further insights, we sat down with Lorine Stoikowitz, an expert from WellRive, to answer some common questions about the emotional aspects of downsizing. Stay tuned for her valuable advice and tips.
Expert Q&A with Regional Sales Director Lorine Stoikowitz
Q: How do you think about the term “downsizing”?
I speak a lot to general audiences about our services and give them tips to make a successful transition. A few years ago, I started using the term “rightsizing” because I noticed that when I used the word “downsizing,” they started thinking about everything they are going to have to get rid of. They would miss the next couple things I said. So, I started thinking about what our Move Managers are actually doing with our clients when they work with them. Downsizing is an accurate term, but I prefer the term rightsizing as a way to help people think about what is going to be right for them.
Rightsizing is where our Move Managers gently help our clients shift their perspective on their stuff from what they will be losing to what they’re going to need for life going forward, augmented by the best of their former life. It’s both practical and sentimental, but you’re approaching it from a more positive perspective.
Q: How do you approach conversations about sentimental items?
People know they’re not going to be able to take it all. A few years ago, one of our clients was talking about their move. They had about five cabinets filled with sentimental items, and they ended up taking three of them to their new home. We asked them about the items that had been left behind. “I don’t miss that stuff,” the client said. “I have everything I want, and besides, I have pictures of a lot of that stuff. So if I want to look at it, I just look at the picture and it brings it right back to me.”
That’s the real reason we carry stuff through life, because we want the memory. So we tell people: take 20, 30, or 40 minutes to document your home entirely from beginning to end. Not just the things that you think you’ll have to part with, but everything. All the rooms, maybe views out of your window, maybe even a little bit of the neighborhood. That way, when you close the door on moving day and you move to your new home, you know you have those memories at least in one place that you can go to bring them back to you.
So it’s not like you ever have to lose it, no matter what happens. And that helps people a lot.
Q: What do you recommend about making sure family involvement is helpful and supportive?
Everyone should try to attend the initial consultation meeting so that they’re in on it right from the start. That can be done by phone, by FaceTime, or in person — however they choose. But it’s best, if they are going to be involved in the process, to be involved from the very beginning. They are hearing in the presence of a third party what their loved one really wants to have happen. And very often it can be difficult for that loved one to articulate that to their child. They know the child is trying to help them, has limited time to do it, and they feel guilty that they’re having to ask them to help. So we tell clients, we’re here to take the hard work off of everyone involved, and it’s a lot easier for us to do that if we understand everyone’s perspective from the beginning. And then it’s really a matter of communication.
The Move Manager also has to be sensitive to family dynamics and not be doing so much talking when they’re first meeting the people. They really need to do more listening, not only actively, but also the nonverbal signals that you’re seeing. Who is more influencing mom? Who is the one always objecting in the first part of the conversation? You can really tell where everyone is in the first ten minutes of any conversation with the family. Once you understand how the family is feeling, we can work on getting everyone on the same page.
Q: Are there other things that you do to focus on the positive aspects of what can be a pretty emotional and challenging experience?
We need to keep in mind why the person is making the move. They’re making a move because the situation that they’re living in now is not giving them the best quality of life that they could have. And the place that they’re moving to is where that’s going to be provided. The biggest reason people push back to it is just the change, which is uncomfortable for all of us.
I don’t like it any better than our clients do. No one does, because it’s the unknown. You don’t know what’s going to be coming. So the best way to approach it is to try to prepare for it in the best way that you can. Really settle down and begin to focus on why you’re making this change and what will make the best quality of life going forward. That allows you to let go of a lot of the hesitation and stress and negative feelings. It begins to feel like you’re taking control of the situation, which is what we all really want to feel during a period of change.
Q: What is the role of a Move Manager like?
Our Move Managers are a lot like a wedding coordinator or a wedding planner. If you’ve ever worked with one of those, you understand what I mean. If you haven’t, you still know what that person is supposed to do, which is that they are the person who can take the bride’s vision of the perfect wedding day and make it a reality for them. That’s what our Move Managers are doing for our clients.
We know our clients have an idea of what they want. Everyone has moved before. But there’s more than one way to do everything, and the way that we do it allows our clients to stay in control of their move without having to do the work themselves (unless they want to). They just have to make the decisions.
Ready to Rightsize?
Our experienced Move Managers at WellRive are here to support you every step of the way. They handle the logistics, so you can focus on adjusting to your new space emotionally. With WellRive, you receive a seamless moving experience. We coordinate the entire process, from organizing and transporting your items to offering convenient storage solutions, to make your rightsizing journey as smooth as possible.